“You are soooo good at the
many things you do.
So…. why aren’t you happy?”

News Flash: Next Groups start November 7th!

Come strengthen your InnerCompass!

Learn to thrive. Learn to live with Power and Grace.  Instead of  running on auto-pilot, in a continuous cycle of depletion, step back, reflect, and re-connect with your own rich, authentic core, and your deepest values. Even amidst a swirl of demands, with the right support, we can each find “the Me within the We.”  Coming together in InnerCompass circles, we:

• focus on what we do want – instead of what we don’t!
• access delicious optimism, radiant vitality, and a revitalized connection with the natural world.
• cultivate unshakable confidence in inner guidance.
• name our most important promises to ourselves, and keep them.
• cultivate our unique contribution to the larger world while savoring being fully alive!

Ready to Engage Your Power and Grace?

I’m inviting and accepting women who’ve found that inner spark that says…

• I want to (re) kindle the joy of being fully and vitally alive!
• I want to work with my body as ally, and reconnect with the natural world. 
•  I want to  focus on what matters most and grow a compelling vision for my life and career.
• I’m ready for tools and a structure to help me clarify goals and identify inspired actions, and I want support and accountability to help me succeed.

• I want to go on the journey together, with other women ready to do the same.

Together, we:

• learn to work with the full range of who we are, body, mind, spirit, and emotion, to optimize our experiences;
• connect with true sources of inspiration and renewal, including the natural world;
• learn to balance strong external demands with an equally strong internal foundation,
• and actively shape our lives towards our dreams.

We ‘circle up’ by phone an hour each week for learning, laughter, practice, support, and accountability. With specific action steps to take between calls, we each can get on course and stay on course with what matters most.

This course fills so if you’re interested, please email me right away and we’ll set up a phone conversation to help determine if this is the right fit for you.

What’s so special about group coaching?

• Group coaching is actually a blend of teaching, skill building, access to new tools, and coaching. Each session builds on the last. Combined with group support & accountability, it is a potent combination for making powerful and lasting changes.
• Return on investment. This group offer is ¼ the cost of an equivalent amount of one on one work. Yet, group coaching can actually lead to greater breakthroughs!
• By meeting weekly, we keep momentum alive. Each month we’ll have 2 sessions of teaching and tools, 1 session of open coaching (you bring your agenda), and 1 session of structured coaching with coaching questions for each participant.
• Email connection with other group members and your coach between sessions, to celebrate successes, ask for ideas and share our learning.
• Peer support through mini-mastermind groups. You choose the level of engagement. (Many participants grow long-lasting, high-nutrition partnerships this way. I still meet frequently with a mastermind buddy from a group-coaching program I completed 2 years ago!)
• Fully engaged participants finish with real successes under their belts, a road map for success going forward, and extraordinary abilities to self-coach into the future.

Who’s better served one-on-one?

• If time and schedule flexibility are more valuable to you than dollars
• If you prefer the continuous laser focus on your agenda provided by one on one over the camaraderie of group support
• If you appreciate the simplicity of the one on one connection with your coach

 Reach out to me now, and we’ll see if this is the right structure for you. 

The fine print:

• The Fall 2011 InnerCompass circles will meet by phone or web for one hour each week.   Each group is limited to 8 participants. Start date November 7th.
• You get the follow up workbook materials via email after most sessions.
• If you miss a session, calls will be recorded and available within 24 hours.
• Tuition for this 24-session program is $1170… not a bad price for being able to positively and fundamentally shift the course of your life!
• Early bird, pay in full, and bring a friend discounts are each worth $100, making the course even more in reach at $870.

• Early Bird: Commit with your $100 deposit by October 1st and save $100

• Pay in Full: By October 15th, save another $100

• Bring a Friend: this is a fabulous way to strengthen your support both during and after the course. You each save $100!

Rumor has it that I’ve written a chapter that will be published this spring.   Even having written it, and lived through many back and forths with the great folks at my publisher, ISN, it still feels like rumor to me too!  So…  here’s an introduction.  Meet “Embodying Power and Grace”, which (rumor has it!) will be published in Success Simplified: Simple Solutions, Measurable Results, an anthology headlined by Stephen Covey.   I’m posting to remind myself that this really is on its way!

This book is interview format, so here goes!

Kim, in your experience, what’s the most essential component for success?

David,  I see this as the ability to embody both power and grace.  This opens the door to effective reflection and a new kind of action—one that creates access to clarity, ease, and increasingly impressive results, even amid great challenge and change.

To embody a quality, we practice often enough and well enough that we get really good at it. Then, in the heat of our experience, it’s who we are.

Increasing success brings heat – demands, conflicting priorities, much that needs to be attended to, seemingly all at once.  Grace provides a spacious sense of internal ease, even within that heat. This helps us stay present, keep current, and think clearly about what matters. We don’t waste any effort.  Power makes it possible to take a stand for what matters: all our effort is on-goal.  When we combine both, our actions are potent. We also become contagious with a positive spirit that coaxes those around us to magnify the potency of their contributions as well.

Here’s another angle for thinking about this.

Einstein said that if he had an hour to save the world, he’d spend fifty-five minutes defining the problem, and five minutes finding the solution. That’s a strong statement about the value of reflection.

Most of us, though, are far better at action—we feel comfortable being on task but vaguely uncomfortable with stepping back and reflecting. I’m going to side with Einstein, though—reflection gets us to choice. Choice gets us to right action, and this leads to results. Without these, we aren’t leading, we’re reacting! Our actions are driving, and we are in the back seat.

How do we shift gears? Start by being aware of this dynamic. Choose to lead. Get into the driver’s seat. Choose to be at the helm of your own experience. Commit to reflect, choose well, and follow through.

I call this self-leadership. In my experience, when we make this internal move—committing to leading through reflection, choice, and action—it cultivates vivid aliveness, mental clarity, and a fullness of spirit that makes the path toward success its own satisfying adventure.

Later, I’ll introduce eight foundational steps to self-leadership, but let’s start by exploring the skills of self-leadership that most of us have not learned. These skills include how to notice when we’ve been on auto-pilot, how to make a new and better choice without beating ourselves up, how to learn what the best choices are, how to work with others, versus against them or in isolation, and finally, a surprising but essential element underlying all this: how to relax.

Being able to step back enough to reflect, in the Einstein way, requires being able to slow down enough to think clearly and well. In his national best seller, David Allen is clear: “our productivity is directly proportional to our ability to relax.”  This is the both/and: the power of productivity and the spacious breath of grace.  This is the combination that leads to results that sing!

To lead is to choose to be fully present, and thus able to access the best perspective – and the best course of action - in any given situation.  To lead is to make the most of what is.

Through practice, we can learn to access a calm, non-reactive attention that allows us to access choice and right action over and over again.

This quality of awareness is core to optimizing reality and to leadership… of our lives, and anything else we endeavor to lead!

If, however, we react reflexively out of our habitual, ‘auto-pilot’ patterns, formed through experiences over time, we can’t lead … we can only follow.

Yet, we all have some default reaction that kicks in when certain life experiences trigger us. We get “hijacked” by the autopilot settings stored in our neural pathways.

Some call this conditioned tendency, or conditioned response. I call it default setting, or autopilot. Whatever label you use though, the concept is a thick one, so I’ll say it again: if I unconsciously react to a situation based on my past experience, vs. being fully present in the current moment and choosing my response, then I am following, not leading.

To lead is to be able to choose our perspective, and thus our action.

So… how do we, in the moment, access a different frame? How do we generate a different way of perceiving, a different way of being, a different way of doing whatever it is that we do, vs. habitually doing over and over again what we have always done, even when it does not get us what we want?

First, get curious. Learning what our default setting feels like/looks like/sounds like is a first step towards being able to make a different choice.

Here’s a window into my primary default; see if reading this helps you identify your own. Some of you can likely relate.  Or, if this is not your pattern, see if the contrast helps you notice your core default:

Whenever I hit a tough spot interpersonally, every cell in me whispers… “Be an island…. Life is safer that way…”   I will reveal only competence, the way in which I ‘have it all together’, and project a flavor of “I don’t need anything from anyone…”.

I learned that shape as a small child, mastering independence and competence –academic, athletic, and later professional – and thus created an island of ‘safety’ around me.

Don’t get me wrong. I have a rich network of friends, colleagues, and clients. I belong to several great circles of support, many of which I have helped found or have led.

It’s just that I only let people in so far. That’s my autopilot: I only let people get so close.

What do I now choose to practice instead? Letting my humanity show, not just my competence. Accepting help and support, not just offering it to others. Relaxing into the gift of presence that others bring. Essentially, I am practicing a different choice: to fully welcome connection. So that’s my autopilot, and my new choice.

But to be able to explore new choices, it really helps to know what your autopilot settings are!  So let’s help you look at identifying your autopilot.

What are the ways you react over and over again, in similar patterns, even when it does not get you what you want?

Its time to get curious…. really, really curious! Go on a treasure hunt of awareness. Imagine having a video camera on your shoulder that watches you through your days… a compassionate, gentle watching, without blame of judgment…. that notices all that you think, all that you feel, all that you say and do. And notice: what are you drawn to? What do you move towards? What do you move away from? Where do you lose your temper, or your sense of humor?  Where does your body recoil, and tighten in closer to your spine?  What coaxes you open, into a more expanded state?

There are no good answers or bad answers…there is only the gathering of clues as you watch yourself.

Just be curious. Go hunting for your auto-pilot patterns….

So there’s your homework, if you choose to accept it.

Next post, we’ll explore how to shift… out of autopilot, and into choice.

When we can choose, then we can truly change. And when we can truly change, whole worlds open, that we never knew existed.

Happy hunting!